


choices made and paths taken

by Ophelia_L



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: but it's okay she's good at it, jester is basically cad's therapist right now, minor episode 39 spoilers, team cleric, they're so good together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-06 04:14:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16381193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ophelia_L/pseuds/Ophelia_L
Summary: caduceus still isn't really okay. and that's okay.





	choices made and paths taken

**Author's Note:**

> this was written as part of a little fanwork swap between myself and rathernoon on tumblr! they drew me [ this wonderful little thing ](http://rathernoon.tumblr.com/post/179322942248)and i wrote 'em this in return!

Caduceus is still not sure if he made the right choice.

Every time he starts to think it was a good idea to leave his home behind, _something_ happens. He almost drowns, or their ship is captured, or there’s... a hydra. There’s a hydra now. That’s nice.

Violence is not something foreign to him, but there is a stark difference between natural violence and the destruction and chaos that seems to find this group (or is it the other way around? It’s hard to tell at times).

It feels like he hasn’t had a proper moment to breathe since he dove into the water to catch up to the ship.

After Yasha cleaves through the hydra’s body (“No problem,”), Caduceus reaches out to Jester wordlessly and she is there, embracing him and cradling his head gently against her chest. He mumbles something- he’s not even sure what he says, it’s just an expelling of the tension of the fight. 

She shushes him gently, combing her fingers gently through his hair, working out the tangles that have come in battle, the bits of blood and hydra gore that have been flung about the room from various slashes. 

Avantika is wandering slowly around the body of the hydra, inspecting the carnage, saying something about them staying on her crew.

“That’s nice,” Caduceus hears himself say, with not a little bit of roughness to the words. 

Who knows what time it is at this point, but they decide to stop and rest for a while. Maybe not hours and hours, but it’s pretty obvious that they all just… need some time.

Caduceus finds a dark, quiet corner (away from Jamedi, because if he goes near him now there will be a confrontation, and Caduceus doesn’t think he can handle that right now) and just… sits. It feels good to be back on land, albeit land surrounded by ocean. He has begun to hear the Earth Mother murmuring in his ear again, but she’s still too quiet.

He closes his eyes and just breathes. The air is dank, and smells musky and reptilian. After a few minutes of sitting still, he hears gentle footsteps make their way towards him. He opens his eyes slowly to find Jester sitting down next to him and pressing herself into his side. With their height difference, her head barely comes up to his shoulder. Her long silky sleeves pool around her as she sits.

“Hey there, Miss Jester,” he murmurs. “How are you?”

“I’m fine,” she says. “Are you?” Her violet eyes stare into his pink ones with a depth that he hasn’t seen from her yet.

“Oh, I’m- I’m just fine,” he says, trying very hard to keep his voice level. “‘S good to be back on dry land.”

Jester places a soft hand on his forearm. “Caduceus,” she says gently. “I don’t think you are fine.” She reaches up and takes his face between her hands. Warmth radiates from her fingers and Caduceus finds himself leaning ever so slightly into her touch. “I think that I was wrong, when I told you that it would be good to break out of your comfort zone.”

“Oh, Miss Jester, you weren’t wrong,” Caduceus reassures her gently. He places one of his large hands over hers. “I just think this might be...ah...not the best way to go about it.” He sighs gently. “I didn’t think that we’d be doing so… so much of this.”

“I know it’s not what you expected when you came with us,” Jester says, taking her hands off his face and holding one of his hands in both of hers. “And I am sorry that we have put you in danger so many times, and that we have made you scared and tired and sad.”

Caduceus hums quietly. “Thanks,”

“And I promise that we will help you with your mission as soon as we can,” Jester says. “You came with us for a reason, and we won’t let that be in vain. A lot of us know what it’s like to lose your home, and we will do everything in our power to make sure it doesn’t happen to you.” She gets up on her knees and wraps her strong arms around Caduceus. Her hug is gentle, yet tight, and Caduceus lets himself be enveloped by her, which she manages to do quite effectively despite being two feet shorter than him.

She pulls away, still holding him by the shoulders, and kisses him on the forehead. 

“We’re Team Cleric,” she says. “I have your back.”


End file.
